#193: The Tunnel

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I have carpal tunnel syndrome. No, I’ve never been officially diagnosed with it, but I’m confident that I have it. My hands are weak, my joints are twisted, and my fingers feel pain as soon as I start typing or using the computer at all. It’s an unusual feeling, but it’s something I’ve grown accustomed to. Like how people with disabilities or diseases acclimate to the new normal of their lives, I’ve gotten used to feeling a slight twinge in my fingers after typing for long periods of time. It’s worse when I write physically, though. That’s part of the reason why I’ve moved on from my personal journaling and have started writing my blogs on here instead. It helps me relax my fingers, while keeping the blogs to a steady 300-word minimum allows me to stop myself before it gets too out of hand (get it?).

According to orthoinfo.org, “The carpal tunnel is a narrow passageway in the wrist, about an inch wide. The floor and sides of the tunnel are formed by small wrist bones called carpal bones. The carpal tunnel protects the median nerve and flexor tendons that bend the fingers and thumb.” Before doing some research, I never actually knew what carpal tunnel was named after; I assumed it had something to do with the wrist, obviously, but nothing specific came to mind.

When I play video games, that’s usually when I feel the pain the most. My hands can start to fall asleep in the middle of playing games, and if I hold onto a grip for too long, my hands start to feel pressure and pain. It’s not a good or pleasant feeling, that’s for sure. I don’t think I could ever play a game like Starcraft 2 again, at least without damaging my hands even more. Or Super Smash Bros: Melee. Not that I ever was good at those games, but it doesn’t hurt to have fun with them every once in awhile.

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#153: The Guild

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When I first started playing World of Warcraft, years and years and years ago, I met some friends online who had just started playing, too. We quickly became friends and bonded over our immaturity, youth, and playful attitudes. It’s so easy to find like-minded individuals online when your entire personality is shaped by your online presence and what you find on the Internet. Our guild, called “R A W R” (because we were kids who liked memes and cats on the Internet), meant a lot to me, and our regular conversations in guild chat set the standard for what I would come to expect from sociable, inviting guilds. We would set up raids of Alliance cities, and have regular hang-outs in secret alcoves on the world map that no one knew about except us (or so we thought). We discussed guild matters, like who deserved a rank promotion and, more likely, who was being annoying on a particular day. There was drama, of course, as there is in any guild, but we persevered through it. Our guild’s downfall came not because of any drama or anything like that, but because we all, gradually and slowly, stopped playing the same game as each other. I remember quitting at one point and roping in my guild friends to come play other computer games with me, but that never lasted very long. I think one was a browser game, with blue fish and matching cards. That’s all I remember from it.

Some of my friends who used to play still come on every once in awhile, though not as often any more. It’s not the same as it used to be; even if we were to try to recapture that old magic, it’s past that time in our lives. And I think we all recognize that, which is why we don’t talk as much as we used to.